Dr. John Tamilio III, Pastor
© 2020, Dr. Tamilio
Most seminarians (at least those who went to Andover Newton) have to do a year of field education. This is when you work at a church for 10 to 15 hours a week as a student minister. You come-up with a learning covenant that details what you will do — how you will spend your time. More often than not, student ministers end up running the youth group. You do other things — you assist in worship, you visit people who are homebound or are in the hospital — but, by and large, you lead the youth group. I do not know if this is because no one else in the church wants to do it, or that they feel young seminarians have the ability to revitalize this ministry.
I spent four years doing field education, because I wanted as much experience as possible. Suffice it to say, I spent four years leading youth groups.
One of the churches I served was in West Gloucester. For a small church, they were quite active and had a very rambunctious youth group. Footnote: if we could find a way to bottle and sell the energy that pubescents have (especially boys), none of us would ever have to work again. But I digress. I remember one day, one of the members of the youth group, a young girl, asked me if she had to hate her parents in order to be a good Christian. I thought she was kidding, so I asked (with a laugh), “Why would you ask that?” She pointed to a few verses from today’s Gospel Lesson.
Jesus said: “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law — a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’”
First, Jesus is quoting the Old Testament prophet Micah: chapter 7, verse 6 to be exact. Jesus is also known to use hyperbole when he preaches and teaches. A prime example is when he says (earlier in Matthew’s Gospel):
“If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.”
I’ve preached on this passage before, as well as the Gospel Lesson for today. I spoke of hyperbole and how Jesus, especially in today’s passage, is really talking about priorities. He is saying that if our personal relationships — even those within our immediate family — if these relationships come into conflict with our relationship with Christ, then we have to decide. Jesus is saying that the decision is clear: we must choose him above all else. Granted, the odds of this occurring are slim-to-none for most of us. The twentieth century Scottish theologian William Barclay claims the same. He writes, “this terrible choice [choosing between God and close relations] will come very seldom; in God’s mercy to many of us it may never come; but the fact remains that all loyalties must give place to loyalty to God.”[1]
But I think that clash in loyalties surfaces in other ways. No, I hardly think that any of your relatives will ever say, “You know, name, you need to pick between me and God.” Maybe the loyalty question rears its head when it comes to what we do with our time and money. I’m not just talking about ourselves as individuals. This is about us as a church as well. I once read that “a church budget is a theological document; it indicates who and what we worship.” I cannot remember who said that, but it has stuck with me. It is a great way of thinking about stewardship.
One of the many things that I love about this church is that we have placed our outreach budget in the hands of the collective body. Those of you who pledge to the church know that you have an option when you pledge: you can designate how much of your contribution goes to our operating budget (salaries, curriculum, insurance, utilities, and the like) and how much goes toward mission and outreach. Most churches I know and have served have a line item in their budgets for outreach, and that is one of the areas that shrinks during the lean years. The church figures, “This is something we can sacrifice — at least for now. We’ll make it up later.”
Our church doesn’t work that way. Giving is designated. One hundred percent of the dollars given for mission go to mission. Talk to Allie about this.
But putting Jesus first is not just about giving money to the church budget. It is also about the giving of yourself: your time and talent, not just your treasure. If Jesus would look at the time you give to the church and how you use your skills to advance our collective ministry, would he say, “Indeed, it looks as if you are putting me first!” or would he feel as if you are treating him like an after-thought: “I’ll volunteer to help the church, but only after all my other demands are met — and I’ve got some rest. After all, my job and family life are demanding.”
Granted, the young woman I had in youth group wasn’t asking these questions. She saw something in the Bible that seemed to utterly contradict the image of Jesus she had. Why would Jesus — depicted as the embodiment of love, the one who taught his followers to turn the other cheek, the one who taught a message of forgiveness — why would he even utter the word hate, let alone tell us that we need to hate our family members if we want to follow him? This is where sound biblical interpretation is key. The word “hate” here has to do with prioritizations, just as the word “fear” in the expression “the fear of God” is about awe and reverence, not being scared or afraid.
If I remember correctly, my answer to that member of my youth group is no different than the answer I would give to anyone: now or then. The Bible makes it very clear. There are two passages (one from the Old Testament and one from the New) that sums up what is required to be a follower of God, a disciple of Christ.
Micah 6:8
He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
Luke 10:25-27
On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?” “What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?” He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”
It’s pretty clear, isn’t it?
Go forth to live by these principles of love. Amen.
[1] William Barclay, The Gospel of Matthew, vol. 1, rev. ed. (Philadelphia: The Westminster Place, 1975), 395.